Frightening Days on the Front Yard in Washington, DC

,

Since Wednesday the days have been heavy, difficult and fearful.

That morning I rolled over in the bed and turned the TV on early. Things were not being filmed in a studio. All was going on outside. People continued to march up the street and stepping out onto the grassed area. And the crowd moved together shoulder to shoulder to the steps at the front of the Capital, a large sacred building where the crowd was calling out to the speakers standing at a microphone. All the people, mostly men,  were dressed as though they were going to a war.  It did not take long to hear and realize this was not a picnic or a colorful egg search - - -  it was an attack ---- by Americans - dressed up like members of militia groups. 

Ofcourse I was not close by  - -  I was watching from my bed room  

- - thanks to the cameras I could see and hear it all - -  which made it very terrifying.

Three days of watching the reports on what's happened. 5 people killed - on the US ground. The President has not been heard since his rally talks on Wednesday. He did not speak himself now  but many others, voices on TV were talking about him and what he has done - - and there could be more things  - - frightening,  frightening things - - -  in the time before he  loses his power as President January 20th. 

    But there has been a terrific surprise ---- 

    TODAY TWITTER HAS BLOCKED DONALD TRUMP PUBLISHING ON TWITTER!!!

                                                                                                                   

A Favorite John Steinbeck Book

 

 I remember reading "Travels with Charley" as Jim and I rode away from Salinas, California in the 1980s.  

 Today this was a second or third  time reading the book for me - and as I read I was moved again by Steinbeck's talk about being back at his home near Salinas. Steinbeck continued writing on his page " it muddied my memory. When I went away I must have died to my friends and so in their minds I became fixed and unchangeable. My return caused only confusion and uneasiness. Although they could not say it, my old friends wanted me gone so that I could take my proper place in the pattern of remembrance - and I wanted to go for the same  reason.

Tom Wolfe was right. You can't go home again because home has ceased to exist except in the mothballs of  memory."

Today when I spotted the Charley book on one of the book shelves in my office I could not resist sitting down with it and flipping through the pages. As usual when I read beyond a first time I skipped through the chapters to remind myself of the story - 

it was was worth the time.

and the room was deep in the odor of moth balls.

                                                                                                                    

First Day of 2021

Today is the first day of the New Year - 2021  with much to hope and pray for.

It has been gray and cold all day under pattering  rain. 

Thanks to Zoom technology we laughed together with our family - some in Maryland, Virginia and others from Californina - - an hour and a half of laughing which felt wonderful to me.

Doodling helps me put thoughts together--- especially since I am still living tacked down under quarantine rules for protection from Covid-19. 

Catching up with people on the telephone calls helps me stay put at home happily,

January 1st, the first day 0f 2021my friend Lucy and I caught up on how the holidays have gone with her- and with me.  I love talking with Lucy -- she and I have known each other for 48 years so we have plenty to talk about from those days and we also keep up with how the world is changing everyday.

            That day word came quietly by iPhone or email to let people know that Ann Zahn had died.  Ann was a member of the Washington Women's Art Center the same time Lucy and I were. For years we knew each other, often exhibited together, stopped to chat, worked on art projects and two years ago Lucy and I photographed and interviewed Ann as one of the early members of WWAC.  Ann Zahn was a wonderful artist, an imaginative printmaker, a teacher - -  and a dear friend. She will be missed and remembered by many.

                                                                                              

Early in the evening Jim's youngest sister called from California. We laughed at family stories with Jim in them. I  reminded her that Dec. 30th was our 65th wedding anniversary. She laughed, "time flew by."

While we were talking I told her that a few days ago I noticed his eyes were following me from his picture  hanging on our bedroom wall.  "I loved it." 

"Ofcourse," she answered, "its a little miracle."

Thanks God for little miracles.

                                                     

COLLAGE

 

A Painting From My Past

I saw a few paintings like this when our family went to a small museum in Strausburg, France.  I don't remember the name of the artist on the wall in France at that time. I just loved her paintings.  

When we came home I was attending classes at American University and I started painting these kinds of paintings. Drawing the grid on and then working with the colors. 

It was hard but I loved it. One of the professors who was a sort of tough guy asked me if I was losing my mind when he saw me painting these little squares. No I wasn’t losing my mind.  It was stressful because of having to get the colors in the right place. 

There must be more in the studio.

Another important thing about this trip to Germany and France was that it we were all together.

 

Your Name is Your First Story

Thanksgiving has a change this year- - 

its not the regular and usual gathering for Thanksgiving.

Corvid 19 sets another stage when we gather family or friends. 

Its for food and SAFETY.

If you are together around a table you have to wash your hands, sit apart, and wear masks.

if you are not together use  Zoom  to see each other and the telephone to do the annual talking.

Here is a TIP - 

                      Start talking with something easy - - - like Your First Story.  

                                                                                                   

OUR CAT

 

Our cat cries 

 in the hall       

late at night 

                      near the open door to my bedroom.

                                                She wakes me up and I call her 

                                                but she stays away      

                                                                                    cringing.

                                                                                    If only 

                                                                                    she would 

                                                                                                   come       

                                                                                                   closer and closer

                                                                                                    to make my bed                                                                                                

                                                                                                                             warm as toast.

                                                                                                         

         

Don't Forget - Wear Your Masks

        

  Last week they "called it" for former V.P. Joe Biden - now he is elect President - - until the ceremony in January 2021 --along with Select Vice President Kamala Harris. 

Quickly President Donald Trumpt stirred more trouble with his threats to Select President that he would  not give up his White House office. There were TV reports that he was furious about the way things had gone. 

He put his orange hair dye away and now his hair shines fully white. He is not making comments ons  TV or coming out where people can see him.  He has accused others of hiding in the basement - but isn't he the one who is hiding. Several TV speakers on TV said he cannot stand losing.

It has also been said on TV that Trump was not paying attention to the force of the new pandemic surge that is killing many more US people.  Hospitals are being filled; doctors, nurses and others are worn out. They are emotionally stressed as the patients die in their hands. TV programs recount daily so we can hear  how Covid-19 is killing more innocent people and threatening people and families. 

Doctors are pointing out again how important it is for people to protect themselves - wear their masks, keep a social distance from each other, wash their hands and the words ring with the announcement - 

"don't come together for family gatherings on Thanksgiving." 

Doctors and medical workers are counting on people to help - to watch out for themselves, their families, their friends and strangers.                                                     

                                                           

                                                                         

A Bee Hive Hair-do

           

 Just a Bee Hive Hair-do.

Relax Through Suspense

 

Tonight we are watching people talk about how its working

out between two men who want to get a big job

that's coming.

Its not easy to watch as the

people have split Biden and Trump. 

I joined in when people talked about their strong

wishes for the current President to walk out of the White House and leave the position of  President to Biden.

As they pull out all the votes it looks as though the 

current big guy would accept the job I feel sick and want to

scream "no".

Stop... I say to myself. 

Turn off the TV and the lights in the roo

Turn on a movie. 

Pull blankets around you to get warm.

Go to sleep.

They will announce something tomorrow morning....

Then I can know.

Checks Can Return

 

My collaging on this wooden salad bowl started easily twenty years ago. 

I like to work gluing and pasting - picking up things and make them into art.

This piece began when I found a lost small old electric paper cutter.

I was thrilled that day to find it

  along with a box stuffed with 25 year old checks 

  from the bank.

  These two would go together. I was sure.

They did - but I set it aside

  before it was finished. 

A few weeks ago I found the box I had filled with all I checks I still had.

Hurray.

Not thrown away.

 

Good to Have Distractions

Last week I was thinking hard about Corvid and the Pandemic that has been part of our lives since February.  I realized I needed some happy distractions. So, I went looking - digging deep into my memories - for some happy times. Maybe you are looking for some distractions too.

Here is a video/story you might enjoy.

       Captain Kangaroo 

                                             Distractions - 

Not Sure - - - For What

 

Welcome to Diagon Alley at Hogsmeade.

Hanging On

                                         

                              I try everyday to accept that Jim is gone

                                                    

                                          But that does not work.

                             

                                          He is always near-by.

             

                                          Thank You God!

Two Women with Apples

When I was growing up

people told me - 

all the time

eating an apple a day -  
keeps the doctor away - -

???????????????????

 WHAT  HAPPENED!!!!!!! 

Castro Convertible circa 1958

Introducing my aunt Koki

 

An African folk tale, The Cow Tail Switch is a golden nugget for me. In the story five sons find their father’s bones in the jungle where he was killed by a wild animal when he was hunting. They conjure him back to life. The story ends with the wisdom, “no one is truly dead as long as people tell his story.”  Ellouise Schoettler

11/02/2007 

First version written in 2007.

My aunt, Catherine Diggle Brown is very much on my mind these days. Koki is gone, buried in Wilmington, NC, next to her husband Jim Brown but she is not forgotten.

In 2007 Koki's son George walked into my Halloween program smiling and holding up a gift for me. He was carrying one of Koki's quilts, the one she had given to me just before she died. When she offered it to me the last time I saw her I just could not take it - it was too much a final good-bye.

"Is this the right one?" he asked. "Oh, yes. That's it." I had snuggled down under it several times when I spent the night in the cozy guest room in her apartment in Charlotte.

The quilt is made with a simple design. Nine rectangles across, 12 rectangles down - 108 rectangles - sewed together at random. I remember when she made it. Someone gave her a box of drapery fabric samples, pre-cut into rectangles.

Koki believed in recycling. She studied about those pieces for awhile and then decided to piece them together for quilt. Vivid colors, flower prints, stripes, patterns, solid colors, paisleys - colors of the late 70s - pinks, turquoise, blues, yellows and golds. Full of life and joy - just as she was.After she organized and stitched them together she added black stitching  
The scalloped black lines make those colors work together. Its machine stitched except for the hemming. I love seeing Koki's hand in her tiny, neat stitches around the edging. Those hand stitches keep me in touch with her.

Later, at home, I spread it on the bed - mostly on my side. And slipped in under it. 

My Jim does not mind. He loved her too.

We are both glad that she is with us.

********************************************************
This piece added November 2019

Koki died in 2001. I wrote this blog in 2007. Jim died in 2012. 
I still sleep in the warmth of Koki's quilt.

About Catherine Diggle Brown  - from Find a Grave

Catherine Diggle Brown, 84, of Charlotte, died peacefully March 4, 2001, at Greenville Memorial Medical Center, following a period of declining health. She was attended by her children. 

Mrs. Brown was born April 24,1916, in Charlotte, daughter of Samuel Lewis and Mary Louise Cobb Diggle of Central Avenue. She attended Central High School in Charlotte, and graduated from Sacred Heart College in Belmont, N.C. 

In 1942, she was accepted into the Women's Army Auxiliary Forces. She was the 42nd woman from North Carolina to be allowed to enlist in the Army in World War II. She was promoted twice, and was commanding a training company in Ft. Des Moines, Iowa, where she was honorably discharged following a service related disability, at the rank of Captain. She was a member of the United Daughters of the Confederacy and Disabled American Veterans. After World War II, Miss Diggle married James A. Brown Jr., who served from 1950 to 1962 as Assistant Administrator of Greenville General Hospital, and from 1962 to 1970 as Administrator of Gaston Memorial Hospital. 

Mrs. Brown is survived by their three children, James Arthur Brown III of Cary, N.C., George Conril Brown of Washington, D.C., and Catherine Elizabeth Holmgreen of Greenville; three grandchildren, Amanda Leigh, David Joseph and Elizabeth Styron Gault; a brother, Samuel Lewis Diggle Jr. of Charlotte; and sisters, Mrs. Carl Lowery of Charlotte, and Mrs. Carl Duncan of Indian Rocks Beach, Fla. 

Mrs. Brown was a member of St. Vincent dePaul Catholic Church in Charlotte. 

A visitation from 6 to 7 p.m. followed by a Rosary will be held Thursday, March 8, 2001, at Harry and Bryant in Charlotte. Mrs. Brown will be buried with her late husband in Oakdale Cemetery in Wilmington, N.C.

Anniversaries

 

Another Anniversary

Since I posted I have been through another anniversary - one year on March 24th for Jim's Funeral Mass. It was hard. That was Palm Sunday. I chose to go to Mass alone and afterwards I went to our Prayer Group. That was a right decision - to be with folks who were at the Mass last year and who also knew and cared about Jim - and to pray with them. A year - what does that mean when you are grieving? For me it means that the shock has worn off and the fog has lifted and I really feel the loss even more deeply - but others are looking for signs and reassurances that I am "better", that I am getting over it. I can think back to doing that myself - to not understanding that the loss of someone you love is not something you get over. But I am better - better at getting up and going on. I have taken to writing a few sort-of poems especially when I am sitting in the car. 5:10 PM I am sitting in the car outside my house. It is 5:10 PM. Traffic on Brierly Road is picking up as people start coming home from work. This is the time of day the very core of my body most misses Jim. I expect him to come home - even though I know he won't be coming today. or any day. DAMN!

Trip to the Holy Land

 

In June I began collecting bits of memory to remind me of days of my life so I will have plenty of material for my memoirs.
Memories for Memoirs is a way to add smaller bits which I may use as "further flesh" later.
As I remember more I will add it.  Either added to this piece or on its own as another numbered post. 

About A Pilgrimage in Image and Word -






Meditating on the Mount of Olives.

My husband, Jim Schoettler,  took this picture of me on the Mount of Olives early in the morning when we were on a trip to Israel with a group led by Reverend Larry Boadt, a Biblical Scholar and a Paulist priest. I knew Fr. Boadt because at that time I was working as Secretary to the Dean at Washington Theologial Union where he was on Faculty.  When
he asked me if we were going to make the trip with his tour.  I hesitated and then told him I scared of going to the area - "its dangerous". Larry laughed and assured me "I will pray you back, Ellouise, and then you can do a book about the trip." Obviously Jim and I went and it was a fabulous pilgrimage. I used Jim's photo for the cover of the book.  Larry invited Fr. Jim Wallace, C. Ss. R. and me to create a book based on our experiences on the trip for Paulist Press.  I was thrilled for the opportunity. The texts Father Jim wrote for the book are wonderful. I used photos I took as the basis for the drawings. 
I guess that means I can call myself a published artist. 1995

More about the trip to the Holy Land

In Facebook posts the last few days someone is sending pictures from Israel while they are on a trip to the Holy Land. Today they posted a picture on the Sea of Galilee.

Seeing the pictures brought on a flood of memories of the trip Jim and I made more than a dozen years ago. The images are still so vivid. I felt very fortunate to find this post about the trip. It brought back many memories.

We arrived in Jerusalem, and then in the next two to three weeks of our tour we moved on to the Galilee, to Mt. Nebo, by way of Petra in Jordan, and then we crossed into Egypt for a trip up Mt. Sinai ending with another few days in Jerusalem. It was wonderful!

Our tour leader was the incomparable Biblical scholar and Paulist Priest, Fr. Larry Boadt who could be counted on for inspiring sermons and enlightening teaching of the archeology and holy sites. And, lots of laughter.

I am so grateful to have shared the trip with Jim.  There are many sweet and touching memories and a few that are completely hilarious.

When we were at the foot of Mt. Sinai the plan was to climb at 2 am so that we would arrive at the top for sunrise. I knew I could not walk up so Jim hired a camel for me. I was game because I really wanted to climb to the top and share the early morning Mass with the group. It turned out to be quite an experience. The camel driver left the path and in the intense darkness I have no idea whether we were on a well-trodden way or not. I could see our group - including Jim -some distance away with their flashlights bobbing as they walked. The camel stepped carefully and the driver cooed to reassure him he was doing a good job. Initially I was nervous - no - I was scared - and then I began to really see the stars - so bright in the inky sky. It was as though we were on that mountain side completely alone. It was glorious.

Jim reached the concrete dismount at the same moment the camel knelt beside it and the driver said, "Madam, throw your leg over the side." Was he crazy? After two hours on the back of the beast I could not move my leg. Fortunately for my modesty it was Jim's hands Jim reached up and lifted me down.

We were on the top of Mount Sinai at sunrise which is an indelible memory. On the way down the group stopped at an outcropping clearing where Father Boadt said Mass and we had Communion. A blessing.

For the years afterwards when Jim and I heard or read certain Gospel passages we would look at each other, smile and nod. Nothing else was needed.

My heart aches for that closeness with each other's memories.